Why inner voice led evolving doesn't lead to higher energy

For years deep transformational insights have been pouring through me, and I've spent most of my time processing what I've received for my own growth and developing ways to serve it up to transform others.

At the same time, I'm sitting with a perception that what all humans want, and therefore what I have to deliver to make any sales in business, is higher energy.

Relief from low energy, depression, anxiety, stuckness. Bliss. Ecstasy. 

Continual high energy and no pain seems to be the fantasy of every human.

High energy and/or relief from low energy is what marketing coaches teach entrepreneurs to deliver.

It's what pharmaceutical ads promise with children running around their smiling, gorgeous parents (while the fine print speaks that one of the side effects of this drug may be death).

But I always reached a stalemate, because it became clear to me fairly early in my own evolutionary journey that the path of being guided by my inner voice through evolving isn’t going to guarantee higher energy than the common, mass-energy paths that are abundantly used by humanity today.

It became clear to me fairly early in my own evolutionary journey that this path isn’t going to guarantee higher energy.

Quite the opposite.

It’s pretty much going to guarantee lower energy along the way.

I keep wanting to apologize for that. Or make a caveat by saying eventually you’ll have higher energy if you keep at it.

But no.

Even writing this email subject line, I felt the urge to add “necessarily”: “Why inner voice led evolving doesn’t necessarily lead to higher energy.” Leaving in there the hope that it just might. You might get what you’re looking for here.

But no.

It doesn’t.

After 4 years and counting since I fully jumped on board the inner voice led lifestyle, my honest testimony is it didn’t make me happier.

Far to the contrary. I’ve spent countless Friday nights alone, and not just happily alone, either. Painfully alone while trying to forget or mask the loneliness that’s right there. Giving in and crying about it.

Days marked with wailing. Or dread. Or just barely persisting while wishing I could just give up. 

Other days of doggedly persisting despite the no energy that makes me want to just crawl in bed and start again tomorrow.

Other days when I did crawl in bed and start again tomorrow.

The other day I was in that dread again when I started an inner voice session. I counted 14 minutes of voice journaling about the pain I felt before I dropped in to hear inner voice (being/source) speaking to me. 3 minutes later, I paused, to abruptly interrupt the session with the shocking realization that the dread I’d felt was nowhere to be seen. All I felt was peace.

3 minutes later, I paused, to abruptly interrupt the session with the shocking realization that the dread I’d felt was nowhere to be seen. All I felt was peace.

Peace feels different, though, than heightened energy that humans seem to be searching for. It's being fully filled from your inside, knowing and experiencing the oneness that you already are.

There. I gave the caveat. This path leads through a lot of pain, but you’ll also experience deep inner peace.

I almost don’t want to make it about that, though, because I'm not here to give hollow promises to meet what minds search for. I'm here to deliver the substance the mind can't even imagine.

The reason you feel a lot of pain on this path is you face all the hard things. The things that other people mask the pain of. Your arm may have gangrene, but you can hide it for a while. When you address it, it’s going to hurt. Badly.

What happens on this path is that you stop hiding from and placating the core sense of lack of Source presence. 

You admit and face your pain-filled, broken parts. And that process ain’t pretty.

Me to inner voice:

Why is there a sense of need of proving that [Eva's] way leads to higher energy?

Inner voice answer:

'This is the perception in this human of what humans want, and it is indeed what is being sought for when it is assumed that a true meeting at their core cannot occur.

The true pain at the root of all else is that humans feel separate from source. It's perceiving yourself as a human | being. Not a human-being.

That perception of separation from who you truly are leads to a painful feeling of lack, of something missing deep at your core. You feel not enough.

You always know that something is deeply off, but since the mind can't fix it, what it does instead is look for high energy that can obscure your innate knowing that you're meant to be more, mask the pain of not experiencing who you truly are, and lead to experiencing whatever is deemed to be "fun".

Seeking higher energy isn't a path to fulfillment. But it is a path (at least short term) to reduced pain and more fun.

The mind looks for high energy that can obscure your innate knowing and mask the pain of not experiencing who you truly are.

My first business name, back in 2019, was Ecstatic Soul Calling. 5 years later, I know that a key aspect of the work I'm here to bring is to help you come into crystal clear understanding about what the heck you're here on this earth for. 

On that path, if your journey is anything like mine has been, you're going to experience moments/days/seasons of heightened energy that indeed feels ecstatic. But you'll also be with low moments when everything around you looks dark. And you'll face the dark, allow it, love it, and instead of always just pressing mute on it, you'll let it play. And that's how you'll transmute it.

So I'm no longer marketing my work as "Ecstatic" Soul Calling. But if you're ready to move beyond the masking ways of mind and reach into your inner knowing of why you chose to incarnate in this body and what your life on earth is really all about, I'm inviting you to consider my current offer. It's a 6-session package of 1 on 1 inner voice sessions and deep work to discover and integrate what you're actually here to do. And along the way to develop your ability to connect with your well of inner wisdom and release old stories and false assumptions that keep you from seeing your true life path.

Reach into your inner knowing of why you chose to incarnate in this body and what the heck you're here on earth for.

And when you come to know for sure why you're here, that's when you have confidence to continue no matter how hard it gets.

It's why I'm still continuing after 5 years of growing a body of work inside me with little external to show for it. And with higher energy today than ever (with still some low points). Because I know that I know that in bringing this to you, I'm living my soul calling, even though it's definitely not always ecstatic. And I don't need it to be. 

What I'm searching for isn't heightened energy. It's reality.